Britney Spears isn't fat. The media is an ass.

I watched Britney Spears open the VMA's with what supposed to be her "big career come back." Well, it certainly wasn't a come back. The performance did suck, to say the least. You could obviously tell she not only wasn't into it, but also barely even knew the routine herself. As a performer, she failed at her job; which deserves all the critical reviews in the world. However, the media coverage of Britney Spears since the VMA's has been completely focused on how "fat" she is.

It would just be overly sensitive and dishonest to say her looks haven't gone down hill over the years. She clearly doesn't work out like she used to, and she obviously can't pull of the same wardrobe as she used to be able to. But does anyone bother to look beyond the surface of what is going on in this girl's life? Her life is all over the news, so anyone who's calling her fat has to know she has been through an insane year, full of divorce and rehab; oh and that small fact that she has had TWO KIDS. Are people seriously blind or is there a shortage or mirrors in this country; because Britney Spears today (At her worst) is still in better shape than over 90% of the country. Jay Leno, a man who probably has health issues due to his weight, joked that Britney's big come back was coming back from the buffet line. Ok, I'll admit it, that's a funny joke but it has no basis to it, and it certainly shouldn't be coming from a cartoonish, overweight, graying man.

There has been so much attention given to the rise of eating disorders in young girls these days. So many magazines and websites gives reasons and explanations for why girls are starving themselves these days; and discussing how horrible the problem is. But when it comes to a celebrity like Britney Spears, it's a media storm of criticism and jokes. Even Joe Scarborough was poking fun at her. The names that people have given her since that performance are so cruel. And these people calling her these names are the same people claiming to give a damn about eating disorders. What do you think a 12-year-old girl is going to think when people laugh and make fun of someone ruthlessly for being fat? What message does that send? Not to mention, Britney Spears is a human being who experiences hurt and pain. If the things that are said about her were said about me, or any girl I know, they would be absolutely crushed and possibly permanently damaged. What is being said about her and how she is being treated, honestly scares me that she could become suicidal. But no media figures care about what effect their words have on her, so long as their rating goes up or they get a good laugh. It will only be when she kills herself, that those same media figure will start discussing the perils of depression.

Women are from Earth, men are from Mars

I went through the majority of high school never having had a serious relationship with a guy. I always found I was content with a few good girlfriends and a gay guy as my social circle. Not to mention, most of the guys in my old high school were either immature mentally or physically, both of which steered me away from trying to forge a relationship with of any of them. Then senior year, I started to like guys more and felt there were some that I could really get along and who weren't immature. To make an extremely long story short, I ended up falling for one of the first guys I got along with. He ended up having a laundry list of pyschological and personality disorders, which gradually became apparent over time. At the time I thought I loved him; but now looking back on it, the only reason I believed I was in love with him was because he was the first guy who ever told me he loved me. I made a huge mistake by staying with him and getting too emotionally close with him. The relationship ultimately brought me down in so many ways, and it made it seem impossible to ever make an exit. Finally, after I had been given every warning sign and had every arguement in the world with him, I cut him out,-cold turkey style. Ahh LIBERATION!!! It was great. All of a sudden it felt like a mental maid service had gone through my head and cleaned it all up. There were no more harrassing phone calls, immature threats, mind games, etc. I could finally be a young women and experience life the way it should be, sans men. I need to specify that when I say "without men," I don't mean a world without men. At the least, what I mean to state is that most young girls would probably be a lot better off without having a guy consuming so much of her time and emotional energy. Of course, this isn't the truth for every girl; but honestly, most girls I have heard talk about their high school and college romances have expressed deep frusteration, if not depression, souly because of her relationship with her signifficant other.

I just wish that for all the tears so many women have cried because of the man she's with, it could stop at some point. I hope to find a man one day that I can live happily with and get along with; however, until I graduate college, it isn't my desire to be in anymore boyfriend-girlfriend relationships. I just think this is too much of a critical time, in terms of changing and growing mentally, that comitting yourself and your life to one person can possibily open up some uncertain and potentially dangerous doors. I'm not reffering to physical abuse, but rather the emotional nature that comes with so many relationships these days. I'd rather let myself continue to learn and grow; make mistakes; acheive my own success; without having a boyfriend breathing down my neck.

I'd like to make it clear that I'm not man bashing here. I probably have more guy friends now than girlfriends. Hanging out with a guy and talking to a guy can be awesome. I always want to hear the opposite sex's opinions and thoughts on a variety of issues. Actually, it's probably all those legitimate, cool guys that I have encountered whom have solidified my opinion about young women and being in a serious relationship. This is why:

Lets say I meet a guy and we soon get into a political conversation that is clearly interesting and stimulating for both of us. It would be ideal if we could continue to talk and hang out; but so often, young men will be too quick to jump to make a move, romatically speaking. How does agreeing on issues about politicis( not exactly considered to be an especially sexual topic; unless you're talking about republicans in the Senate) qualify us to start dating? It doesn't. And no doubt, after you turn that guy down, you can kiss goodbye those interesting political conversations.